Secret Service Poo Collectors
In the late 1600s, King Louis XIV of France regularly held official meetings while sitting on his beloved "throne." Known for his absolute command of power, Louis was an impartial ruler when it came to poo, unabashedly relieving himself in front of royalty and peons alike. Perhaps Louis XIV's comfort level with defecation contributed to his record-setting seventy-two-year reign of power. After all, what opposing ruler could effectively negotiate with the king when faced with the constant threat of having to witness his majesty's next bowel movement?
Three hundred years later, this "open-door" poo policy has been replaced by secrecy and paranoia. On a trip to Vienna, the White House flew in a special presidential crapper so that President George W. Bush's feces could be collected and disposed of in a secure manner. Secret Service agents capture Presidential Poo in order to prevent foreign intelligence agencies from collecting information about the commander in chief's health. Government agencies, including the United States' C.I.A. and the Israeli Mossad, have used this approach to gain valuable information on the health status of world leaders such as Mikhail Gorbachev and former Syrian President Hafez al-Assad.
"What's Your Poo Telling you?"
Josh Richman and Anish Sheth, M.D.
Where do I sign up for that job?
"Agent Summer report to my office ASAP! Your next mission should you choose to accept it or not is to infiltrate President Chavez's bathroom and kidnap his shit for further analysis!" (analass-ass).
India Summer
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