Thursday, August 06, 2009
Breaking News
Current mood: grateful
Some news reports leaked from Bill Clinton's humanitarian mission to North Korea reported that Mr.Clinton carried a secret message for North Korean leader Kim Jong-il from President Obama. The Obama administration denied the report.
After partying with Bubba from 4am to about 5 minutes ago, I can now report on the secret negotiations. It turns out it wasn't a secret message of appeasement. It was an XBOX 360, a copy of "Drill, Baby, Drill" and a large altoids tin full of Viagra. I guess that's all Kim wanted.
Clinton and Kim Jong-il exchanged pleasantries through an interpreter. Kim Jong-il reportedly asked former President Clinton if he had heard Tiger Wood's roaring fart and stated that he thought Bill had poor taste in women. Bill, smiling and laughing, retorted that Kim was much too short to even be classified as a circus midget in the US and that he had a girl's name. He also said that only feminist-sissies spell their name with a hyphen and that if the last part of his name was an adjective, he forgot an "L". Then they rubbed their penis heads together, did a low 5, and Kim was out the door with his XBOX tucked firmly under his arm. Kim did wonder what the gooey smudge on "Drill, Baby, Drill" was from. Clinton just had that sloppy grin on his face.
That's the scoop. Reporting from Los Angeles this is India Summer.
©India Summer
No comments:
Post a Comment